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Epiphany

By Marie Diaz-Cervo

She is an alpha woman, she speaks her mind and unable to be loyal to people that think maybe she is their friends. You cannot treat people with bad attitude and expect them to remain your friends. When she wants something from people, she used that delicate voice as a sort of manipulation. If you are naive, you will think oh she likes me.

I noticed others utilize little girl voice to make people help them. That voice is soft and angelic. These must be the voices they used to get things from their fathers and tickling down to their boyfriends and husbands.

I want to know and develop that kind of manipulation toward people to get what I want from them. The same people can also lie to get what they want from others.

I went to visit my mother after church, and it was a hot day. She had three fans one and the ceiling fan on also. My old furniture is at her home since I resided in the main house. My furniture and appliances are distributed all over my sisters and mom homes. My brother gave her an IPad so she can skype or facetime with her grandchildren, she enjoyed the knowledge on the freedom she has. I saw the IPad, therefore, I decided to teach her how to use YouTube to watch fashion shows from different designers. Mom saw the show and got so happy because she loved fashion. I enlarged the screen for her, and she said I made a dress like this already. I closed the page and asked her to demonstrate how to open the apps.

We also have a conversation about how hot it was in my room since it is on the second floor. She said someone stole her air conditioner from the garage. I told her I went to home depot and saw a small one, but it was too heavy.

A family friend came over and got into the conversation and told us that he saw an air conditioner for $118.00 at Hallmark. My mother said buy two and here is the money. Her friend suggested he will come with me. I told them we can go to home depot because it was closer. I got in the car, and he made a smart remark “wow you know how to drive” I answered “actually.” Did I ask him how old are you? He said Fifty years old. I used the google map on my cell to get the direction to the store so that we can get there faster. I stopped for gas, and he asked how come the car is making so much noise. I told him the car is old and I also said that everybody stated that Subaru is a good car. He said it is a Japanese car, so is Toyota. When we got to home depot, the air conditioner was sold out. We when back to my mother’s house without going to another store, because he was angry. He told me he needs to get AC Pro for his car, and he didn’t have the money for it, so I said I will buy it for him, but he said no. I also asked how come his family is so close to my mother; he told me that his mom and my mom were good friends almost like sisters when they were young.

My mom said to me when I got back; your sister is having a party for your nephew for his going away to college. I told her I’d take her and head out to another store to purchase the air conditioner. She wanted to go with me to the store, but I told her I would take her to my sister because I wanted to go alone to the store this time.

My then husband’s teenage daughter got her driver’s license; they usually go to the school together, but our thirteen-year-old got sick and had to stay home in bed. She said to me “are you coming with us” she just assumed that she was just going to take the car without asking. I laugh and told her no and that she was not going to take the car and told her to come upstairs. I said to her did you asked me if you can use the car or did you just assumed that you automatically take the car. I told her that I need to get food for her sister that was sick and it is my car, therefore, she needs to ask. I looked at her and felt all the confidence that she had and told her to learn to be humble. A car is a big responsibility and it would off make sense if she asked. The next day she went to her father’s sister house and came back with my sister in law’s car. I knew at that moment I was in for a rude awaking, the relationship changes at that moment. Now she is married and more mature, if she wants some kind of relationship, it would be alright with me.

The warning signs are there before a person cut ties with you or betray you. If you pay attention to what the person does or says, you can be aware of what is about to come. The person might abandon someone else before, and you think there is no way that person will do this to me. Your job is to move forward and spend times with people who love you and accept you. You can also reach out to others who might need a friend, and it will make you feel so much better.

Read more of my writings at www.amazon.com/author/mariediazcervo

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Corporation

By Marie Diaz-Cervo

I had to do a lot of self-development in order to run the cooperation with the team for a number of years while my husband was running the financial business full time in order to get promoted to Regional Vice-President. I had to learn deal with different personalities, some were melancholy, sanguine, choleric and so on. I had to know what type of personality I was and had to work on myself to be a better leader. Actually, the most difficult personality helped me to be a better leader, sometime I would question it was my gender, color or nationality. At the time I learned that it wasn’t personal, I learned to forgive. The stress took a toll on my health, I was hemorrhaging constantly and would get very tired. I had to slow down and asked God for a miracle to get back my health.

Leadership & self-Efficacy

By Marie Diaz-Cervo

The behavior specialist at my job is a naturalist and she dresses the part. She loves the special needs children and I like her because she can see me and when I did a great job with the ABLss assessment of the students she told everyone how I did so great and I am really great at. She stood up for me when others just tried to hide my gifts and also took the rewards for my works. Not everybody is capable of shining the light on someone else unless the person has a great self-confidence. The lead teacher did not say a thing about how I helped her and worked hard at my job. While I helped and do my best another coworker tried to emotionally abuse me and I did not know how to deal with it. Since she was a white Italian woman she just figured she can do whatever she wanted, so at a meeting Lisa asked everyone to write a concern about what is going on and I did, then I tried to get rid of the paper but Lisa told me to put it back. At that meeting, the psychologist, social worker, and the lead teacher were also there so they heard my concern and they took action and remove the coworker from the building I was working at.

Achievement motivation is what a person focus on to get the outcome of the goals and plans that he or she set out to get. A person might want to get more money or more recognition, therefore, the end result would be the drive to do the best he or she can at school or at work.

I do my best and learn what I need to learn so I can succeed in achieving the goal and plan that I want to get. Those efforts are the pathway to accomplish what I set out to achieve.

I can increase my own achievement motivation to manage challenges and overcome obstacles as I work toward reaching my goals by focussing on the more impact I will make when I get my degree. People would not be able to say that I do not have the credential to get another higher position at my job. I would make a higher earning which I could help more people who need financial help. I would get more respect and stop the whispering from people who only get the job because they know someone who works at the board of education, I am also motivated to have wealth so I can show my ex-husband that he did not make me. He went and married his mistress a few months after our divorce. My motivation is the keep moving forward without taking another’s woman’s husband.

In order to reach my goal, these two concepts are relevant to help me. Self-determination theory is a concept that will keep me moving forward no matter what the obstacles because I am driving to achieve the goal that I set, I do not need other people to boost me to do what I need to do. Some people can move for internal reasons or external reasons. You can do something because you like it or because of the outcome that would follow. Those who are more intrinsically motivated generally give more effort, persist longer at a task, and perform better than the people who are extrinsically motivated.McCarthy, C. J., DeLisi, M., Getzfeld, A. R., McCarthy, C. J., Moss-King, D. A., Mossler, R., Privitera, G. J., Spence, C., Walker, J. D., Weinberg, R. S., & Youssef-Morgan, C. M. (2016).
Goal setting has the steps for me to achieve the plan. It is in writing and I can look at it to see what is my next task. It makes it easier to see how I am going to reach the goal. There are two ways I can achieve a goal, one is I want to be the best and the other is I want to show off. I can compete with myself or I put other people down.

References:

Bandura, A. (1997).Retrieved from:https://www.countway.harvard.edu/
Judge, T. A., Jackson, C. L., Shaw, J. C., Scott, B. A., & Rich, B. L. (2007). Journal of Applied Psychology, 92(1), 107-127. doi: 10.1037/0021-9010.92.1.107

McCarthy, C. J., DeLisi, M., Getzfeld, A. R., McCarthy, C. J., Moss-King, D. A., Mossler, R., Privitera, G. J., Spence, C., Walker, J. D., Weinberg, R. S., & Youssef-Morgan, C. M. (2016).Retrieved from:https://content.ashford.edu/

Gaby DiCervo

Gaby DiCervo is a third-degree black belt in Shotokan, she also teaches kickboxing, self-defense, and krav maga. She is a fashion blogger at http://www.fiercelybeautifulblog.com
Who Is Gaby DiCervo?
Gaby DiCervo was born on December 16, 1995, in Livingston, NJ. She graduated from Belleville high school and attended LIM for fashion merchandiser. She is the Manager at Sovereign Martial Arts Of Howell and Owner at Fiercely Beautifulblog.com.

Early Life and Career
Born Gabrielle Ange Diaz-Cervo on December 16, 1995, in Livingston, New Jersey, Gaby DiCervo began Karate with her sister and brother at age 2 and dropped out of college to advance her business in karate. It was there that she performed in videos and tournaments. She did different advertisings for karate, self-defense, kickboxing and krav maga.
In 2010, Gaby signed with Sovereign Martial Arts as a head instructor and she worked as a model for different designers and boutiques.FullSizeRender(2)FullSizeRender-8

Adopt The 10x Mindset

By Thomas Oppong

There are no absolutes in life. And there are no givens. Everything is up for grabs. Most people dream of accomplishing something extraordinary in life. But life slips by and their most meaningful dreams slide silently to the side while they’re getting everything else done.

Grant Cardone says, “Never reduce a target. Instead, increase actions. When you start rethinking your targets, making up excuses, and letting yourself off the hook, you are giving up on your dreams!”

Operating at an exponentially higher level is exactly what you need to do better and be successful in your endeavors. But everything starts with a decision to aim higher than usual. Only those with the right mindset, attitude and skill can take advantage of the enormous human potential.

You can’t achieve extraordinary results with an ordinary mindset

“The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.”― Michelangelo Buonarroti

Many people are far below their expectations because they have big dreams, incredible ideas, and fantastic goals but put in little or no ACTION.

As you build on your accomplishments and your confidence grows, you will naturally want to aim higher. Now that you’ve got some momentum going, it’s time to double your effort.

Extreme success in your own terms can only be achieved by taking massive action with the 10X rule, a concept made popular by Grant Cardone.

The 10X rule is based on the idea you should figure out what you want to do, goals you want to achieve, and multiply the effort and time you think it’ll take to do by 10.

In his book, 10x Rule, The Only Difference Between Success and FailureGrant provides an awesome blueprint for how you can rise above the status quo to take “massive action” instead of behaving like everybody else and settling for average results.

“The greatest turning point of my life, both professionally and personally, was when I stopped casually waiting for success and instead started to approach it as a duty, obligation and responsibility,” says Cardone.

We have a tendency to underestimate what we can accomplish, and therefore set lower goals and not reach our full potential.

When you apply the 10x rule and mindset to your thinking, and apply it to how you act, you can do more in the shortest possible time. And you will still have time to take care of a lot of other things on your to-do list.

Stay hungry!

The idea of a 10x advantage is to aim ten times higher when you set your goals in business and life. You are probably not thinking big enough about your life’s work, projects, and what you want to achieve in your career.

A 10x mindset or goal means that if you come up short, you’ll still find yourself further along than if you had maintained your life’s current goals, visions and everything else you have planned to achieve.

Christopher Reeve once said, “So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then, when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.”

And it also means that you open yourself up to bigger possibilities for the future that make it increasingly easier to make decisions and take action in the present. You can move and work your goals 10 times faster while being consistent and persistent.

But don’t underestimate how much energy and effort it will take to push things through though. Things could take longer to complete or cost more. Plan for these things you plan to focus on ahcieving more using the 10x rule.

Thinkers and dreamers are the new untouchables

“Between the great things we cannot do and the small things we will not do, the danger is that we shall do nothing.” — Adolph Monod

We’ve been conditioned to think small, simplify and to expect less and demand less from life. Don’t be subject to the tyranny of “how things have always been done”. Find your true north and push past the default.

For centuries we’ve been trained by the system to stop thinking and do as we are told. But dreamers and thinkers change the world. They don’t follow any logic. It’s hard to replace the dreamers with algorithms.

Can you build something people will look for, will talk about or something we would miss if it were gone. Think about your capacity to think creatively and exponentially. And your your capacity to provide value to others. Start seeing things from a wider and far reaching perspective.

You should start thinking big without reservations. Practice thinking about your future being 10x bigger and better, and you’ll develop a new 10x standard for viewing the world.

You can only contribute more, learn more, become more and stretch yourself and your own abilities beyond their current psychological limitations if you give yourself permission to think beyond the obvious.

Turn mindset into action

The right intentions will only get you so far. You also must act. A 10x mindset radically shifts your thinking, your decision-making, and the actions you take.

Start identifying actions that are blocking your progress toward 10x growth and get rid of them. Focus on doing even better at those things you’re already good at and stop worrying about everything you struggle with.

Tackle every project with the 10X Rule, acting like you have to succeed because your life depends on it.

Before you go…

If you enjoyed this post, you will love Postanly Weekly (my free digest of the best productivity, career and self-improvement posts). Subscribe and get a free copy of my new eBook, “The Power of One Percent Better: Small Gains, Maximum Results”. Join 23,300+ readers.

What’s the cheapest business to start?

By Erik Tozier

I was grabbing a coffee with a friend the other day and in the coffee shop, we got into a conversation with a gentleman who started telling us about his food truck. He was going on about how they originally took a $50k loan to get the business going, and how he was spending 16 hours a day on the business. I was supportive and respectful, but not how I look to go about my businesses. 16 hours a day at the beginning, maybe 1 hour a day once it’s launched.

Brick and mortar businesses are going out of style. Brick and mortar businesses are expensive as well ($50k for a food truck with no guarantee of success!!) If you want to make it big, you have to leverage your network and the reach of the internet.

I’ll give you a few business ideas that cost less than $200 to start. Most are built around creating content and building an audience. Content creation is a great way to start a business. Essentially, build an audience, then monetize. I will also list a few others.

  • Blog (less than $50 for domain name and 12 months of hosting fees)
    • Start writing unique content on a specific niche and you will build an audience. Over time, you can add ads, affiliate links, products, coaching courses, etc. to your blog. Since you already have an audience, they will be open to buying.
  • Social Media Sites: Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Facebook (free)
    • Why not utilize a platform that already has millions of users? You can create an account on any of these platforms and start building a business this way.
    • I watch a lot of YouTube videos and it’s crazy how people can make a living off creating videos.
    • One downside of these platforms is if they change their algorithm or pay-out structure, then you may lose out on views, ad revenue, etc.
  • Consulting or Coaching (Free, but will take time to build a client book and reputation)
    • Are you an expert in a certain field? You can contract for and consult clients for a solid hourly wage. It’s a fun job and if you can communicate well, it would be a solid role for you.
  • Digital Product Creation (think e-book or how-to-guide, Free)
    • Creating a e-book on an area you are passionate about and sell it for a few bucks. The only time you spend is upfront, after that, it’s passive income.

It’s a great strategy these days to leverage the internet’s wide reach. There is so much money in the world right now… we just need to go and get it.

About me

I’m Angie! I was married for 13 years and I have two children from the marriage, I gave birth to our beautiful daughter, Gabrielle and our son Anthony. My children are karate instructors and I am very proud of them.

I am now 51 and although I was born and raised in Haiti, I now reside in the United States. I went to high school in NYC and my mother wanted my siblings and me to have a better life, so we moved to New Jersey!

My son Anthony Diaz-Cervo has a vlog channel on YouTube where he shares parts of his life, and my daughter has a blog www.fiercelybeautifulblog.com. I wanted my own creative outlet to express myself. With that being said, I originally started blogging for the karate school I had with my then husband, beginning of 1996 as somewhat of a hobby because I simply love to write.

I’ve always had an entrepreneurial attitude and love owning something of my own. This blog has become so much more than a hobby to me, I’ve been fortunate enough to pursue this as my growing career, one I have always dreamed of.

I have so many interests; motherhood, parenting, fashion, writing, self-development and so much more which is why I chose my name to use as my blog title. I thought for months, “what kind of title represents me?” and I just couldn’t think of anything more fitting than my own name.

I am a go with the flow type of gal with a passion for creating. I am always looking for fun, exciting opportunities to work with brands and companies to create great content together!

Making Your Life Golden

SABON“>Sabon

By Mark Ford

I have always been a strong opponent of television. But, K and I recently started watching it together. Just a little bit here and there; enough to get me thinking about the way people spend their recreational time.

It made me wonder if the kind of activities we engage in during our down time really makes a difference.

I’ve also pointed out that the more time you spend working, the more successful you’re likely to be – but acknowledge that even the most ambitious and hardest workers need to take at least a few hours out of the day to do something that gives them pleasure.

Something that doesn’t work.

The question then becomes, “What should that ‘something’ be?”

As I said, just about any activity we choose to do can fit into one of three categories. It can:

  • Damage us in some way
  • Improve us somehow
  • Leave us more or less the same

Think of the best choices – the ones that improve you – as Golden.

Think of the neutral choices – the ones that just help you pass the time – as Vaporous.

And think of the worst choices – the ones that hurt you – as Acidic.

It’s up to you how much Gold, Vapor, and Acid you are going to have in your life.

When I think of my own choices – good, bad, and neutral – I notice that they have the following characteristics:

Golden Choices

My best experiences tend to be with activities that are intellectually challenging and emotionally engaging. Because they demand a lot from me, I shy away from them when I am low in energy. But when I do get into them, they build my energy and thus make it easier to continue. When I am through with such an activity, I feel good about myself and content with how I have spent my time.

Vaporous Choices

These activities are easy to slip into and easier, too, to stay involved with. They are the choices we make when we don’t feel like making choices. The time we spend when we don’t much care how we spend our time. Welcome to the Vapor zone, the neutral, happy world of poker and sitcoms and gossip.

When I’m ready for some relaxation, my first impulse is always to choose a Vaporous activity. Having “worked hard all day,” I want something simple and mindless so I can gear down. And most people would probably say the same thing. Getting into the Vapor zone is easy – and staying there is easier still.

The big problem with Vaporous activities – and this is a very big problem for me – is that they leave me feeling enervated instead of energized. And empty. Vaporous activities do for me what Vaporous foods (i.e., comfort foods) do: They fill me up but tire me out.

Acidic Choices

Everybody has vices. At one time or another, I’ve had just about all of them. I have never smoked crack, but I’ve done plenty of other things to destroy, reduce, or disable myself.

Why I do these things, I can only guess. Sometimes I think I need the challenge of surviving self-imposed obstacles. Whatever my reasons, the result of making those choices is generally the same.

I get a dull pleasure that is mixed with a barely discernible level of pain. Even when the pleasure is intense, it is clouded by a foggy brain. It feels like I’m having a great time … but I am not sure. And if the actual experience of Acidic activities is mixed, the feeling afterward is not at all ambivalent. It is bad.

The interesting thing about Acidic options is how attractive they can be. Nobody would argue that they are good choices. We pick them because we are too weak to pick anything else, and we use what little mind we have left to rationalize our self-destruction.

Let’s Take a Closer Look at These 3 Categories

… Continue reading

How to Separate Yourself From the Competition

 


By Dorie Clark @dorieclark

Many entrepreneurs are stymied by the question: how am I actually different from the competition? We know it’s essential to identify a “unique selling proposition,” but in a competitive marketplace where it seems everything’s been done, it can sometimes be hard to articulate your specific value.

That’s why one of the people I profile in my new book Stand Out is television chef Rachael Ray — precisely because, on the surface, she didn’t stand out at all. But as her example shows, one important strategy entrepreneurs can follow is reframing your expertise so that what’s banal in one setting becomes revelatory in another.

In her world — the world of cooking — it’s pretty clear what “expert” means: you run a high-end restaurant, or you’ve been trained at elite cooking schools. Rachael Ray did neither. As Boris Groysberg and Kerry Herman revealed in a fascinating Harvard Business Review case study, she started out as the food buyer for a gourmet market in Albany, N.Y. and began doing “30-minute meal” cooking demonstrations at the store. The store didn’t choose her for the role because of her prodigious talents; it was because no chef in the area would accept the store’s low rates.

She eventually got her big break when someone gave a copy of her cookbook (published by a one-woman press) to a Today Show producer. When a snowstorm prompted a wave of guest cancellations, the producer called up Ray – who, after driving nine hours in the snow, made her first appearance and was an immediate hit, leading to a lucrative contract with the Food Network.

Ray was derided because she lacked the credentials of illustrious peers like Emeril Lagasse or Mario Batali. She acknowledged the criticism, the HBR case study notes, and even warned the Food Network that “I’m not a chef, you’ve been duped.” But that was exactly why they wanted her.

The Food Network was chock full of elite chefs who made beautiful meals but the trouble was, their professionalism and perfection risked making them unrelatable to everyday people. But viewers intuitively felt that if Rachael Ray — a spunky everywoman with no formal credentials — could make a dish work, they could, too. If she were just another neighbor on your block, her ability to make tasty 30-minute meals would be nice, but not earth shattering. But in the context of the Food Network — which had built a brand around celebrity chefs — she was a revelation.

Today, Ray has created an entrepreneurial empire, replete with television shows, endorsement deals and product extensions — and her example holds lessons for all entrepreneurs. Too often, we compare ourselves to the most “qualified” people in our field and are concerned about not having the most prestigious diplomas or formal qualifications. But as Ray shows, those often aren’t necessary, and you don’t need to compete head-to-head on credentials. If you can offer something distinctive in a given context, you can succeed.

Think about who needs your skills or approach but doesn’t typically have access to them. There are 400 million Spanish speakers worldwide, but there may be very few who serve people in your industry or your community and that could be your competitive advantage. And there may be plenty of people with good communication skills but surprisingly few who blend that with an understanding of engineering or technology. The talents that seem banal in one context can lead to breakthroughs in another.

Ask yourself what perceived weakness could become your strength, and if there’s an area where you don’t have credentials or expertise, which could become a selling point. You may not think you have anything unique to offer but as Rachael Ray discovered, changing the context changes everything.

For They Will Inherit the Earth — The Life Project

A person who is “meek” is often thought of as being resigned to their circumstances, even weak, but that really isn’t what is being described here. Those who are “meek” are those who understand that they are dependent upon God, and not upon their own strength or even upon the power of armies, for our […]

via For They Will Inherit the Earth — The Life Project